Monday, April 23, 2012

Blog 7 - hollywood formula

Opening Scene : A ominous creature that you and I would classify as an alien had been aboard a dim-lit transport ship headed towards an intergalactic prison. This would for sure foreshadow an untimely death. The creature paid no mind to the banter of the other captives, who were talking in native tongues, engaging in verbal fights. Only because a real brawl was improbable due to the shackles and chains refraining much movement. All but one creature had been participating in this ruckus among the melting pot of criminal society, he was all covered up in black rags, hiding most of his face. All seemed to be under control by the guards standing watch by all possible exits. Until the 1st sequence began..

The Big Decision: Possibly the only downfall of the form he decided to take with his time here on earth was school. On his home planet he had recieved the equivillent of a full earth education, while still in his youth. Plus, the multitude of errors in the curriculum he recieved with his time at Shawbrook High School. The day was done. He started off to the bus that would take him back to his new household. On the bus, his peers were all yelling, which has reminded him of a scene all too familiar to him. He wooking out the window as the mundayne routine of a bus ride continued, expecting nothing less than a typical spring day. Until the raid began, Gio now knew a fight was all he had left..

The Final Push: He landed a flawless strike to the chin of a guard, who wanted no more than take Gio to prison for his apparent crimes against his planet. "One down, several more to go" He quietly said to himself. Within the blink of an eye the guards increased in numbers, and began to form a enclosed ring around Gio, preventing escape. Out of the shadows of the cold winter night, a figure all too familiar approached the circle. "Gio, is it?" He said in a chuckle. "You'll regret this pointless chase, boy" Delivering a clean kick to the forehead, as if expecting a blackout. None came. he stood his own, and took the numerous strikes and blows from the surrounding guards. "Your a fool, we'll..." He couln't articulate the sentance, not knowing it was his last. The other guards watched as he was reduced to dust. An eerie glow lingered in Gio's eyes. A half a second later a bright flash ignited the town, fooling its residents into believing it was already morning..

2 comments:

  1. You really developed the story pretty well. The opening scene is cool and interesting leaving a feeling of mystery and suspense. Nice job!

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  2. I think you have a fully developed story I like where this is going. My only suggestion is to make sure the reader can see how you see the story.

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